I woke up yesterday morning with lots of missed calls and voicemails. I talked to Anthony he wanted to know if it was really over. Deep down inside I didnt want to let him go. I love him too much but I know that if I stick around the drama is only gonna get worst. He told me that he couldnt lose me. He said he just couldnt take that lost.
He kept asking me "is this the end, so its over" and I never answered so he knew that I didnt want to end it. So he started asking me to make it official.
"Whats the difference from being girlfriend and boyfriend and what we have now," he asked me.
"Nothing," I answered him.
"Exactly," he responed back.
Then I dont know how we got to this point but he was like ok I cant keep doing this. Then he asked me if he could talk to my friend. MY FRIEND. the girl we were with last nigth, Ciara. He told me he liked her and if he could have sex with her and would every thing between me and him would be the same.
A while ago he asked me the same thing and I hooked them up but at the time it didnt matter that much to me then but it still did because how could he do something like that to me if he cared about me sooo much. I told him he could but it hurt me. He told me he need a girlfriend he's not gay and I guess since I wasnt trying to be it he was gone go to her.
He told me he would do anything for me and I know every word of that was true and I would do anything for him but as much as he loves me he destroys me at the same time. I never had heartbreak the way I have it now almost to the point where I want to call him and say lets be together. I thought I had never been inlove but now I know I've been inlove the whole time. I never felt heart ach before and now I feel it for someone that I thought was really nothing to me.
As much as it hurts I gotta let it go. Its eating me up inside that he would even do that to ME. I know I'm wrong too but just like I asked him how would he feel if I hooked up with one of his friends. I'm almost to the point where I just want to delete all the number out of my phone and start new. Its almost impossible for me not to talk to him or have him in my life because he is a big part of me. Hopefully just like all the other times we end up friends again because I love him soo much.
He kept asking me "is this the end, so its over" and I never answered so he knew that I didnt want to end it. So he started asking me to make it official.
"Whats the difference from being girlfriend and boyfriend and what we have now," he asked me.
"Nothing," I answered him.
"Exactly," he responed back.
Then I dont know how we got to this point but he was like ok I cant keep doing this. Then he asked me if he could talk to my friend. MY FRIEND. the girl we were with last nigth, Ciara. He told me he liked her and if he could have sex with her and would every thing between me and him would be the same.
A while ago he asked me the same thing and I hooked them up but at the time it didnt matter that much to me then but it still did because how could he do something like that to me if he cared about me sooo much. I told him he could but it hurt me. He told me he need a girlfriend he's not gay and I guess since I wasnt trying to be it he was gone go to her.
He told me he would do anything for me and I know every word of that was true and I would do anything for him but as much as he loves me he destroys me at the same time. I never had heartbreak the way I have it now almost to the point where I want to call him and say lets be together. I thought I had never been inlove but now I know I've been inlove the whole time. I never felt heart ach before and now I feel it for someone that I thought was really nothing to me.
As much as it hurts I gotta let it go. Its eating me up inside that he would even do that to ME. I know I'm wrong too but just like I asked him how would he feel if I hooked up with one of his friends. I'm almost to the point where I just want to delete all the number out of my phone and start new. Its almost impossible for me not to talk to him or have him in my life because he is a big part of me. Hopefully just like all the other times we end up friends again because I love him soo much.
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