What do i wanna say??

I'm about to write a poem...haven't don't that in a while


ummmmmmmm....

its almost summer....hope its a good one.

did i tell you that i thought i was pregnant...LMAO

can money buy happiness???

well I'm about to find out...because i think it does ^^



i want to become a boxer...
well not really i cant stand being hit.
but i want to hit somebody...
because im angry



my mom thinks i'm crazy because i pop myself (with rubber bands)
that's just to calm me down when im upset..

im stressed!

Guess Who I saw yesterday...!

Happy!

NO! Eric duh!

Well I was walking to the store down the street. There was a whole lot of guys like hanging out. I wasn't sure if he was over there with them because I didn't want to look over there.

So anyways on my way out the store I rerouted because I looked a mess and there was a lose dog roaming the streets.

So anyways I was walking down the block and saw him leaving out of him grandmothers house. I'm like OMG! NO!...so i like put my hood on so he wouldn't see me.

He noticed it was me and then went back into the house. LMAO!

Like WTF.... how r we BOTH hiding from each other.

We might as well face it. I mean he lives like on the same block that I do. We hang with some of the same people. We hang out at the same places.

soooooo yea we should just get over it. or he should get over it at least cus i'm over it.

He really needs to grow up.

Like really be a man PLZ!

yep. yep. yep. :)

This is where I want to be.

I lOve that boy....

I got love for him shall I say....but I'm not in love with him. Nope.

Now I understand the part in the movie Pretty Woman..when she says that she don't kiss her customers.

That's the only thing that I remember the most, is the kiss. Not the sex we had but the fact that he kissed me. Everytime I think about it i get weak. Love weak. Like oh my god I wish I could kiss him all the time. Feeling his lips on mine. That kiss is the only thing that makes me want him. That kiss was a big deal to me. Bigger than the sex. WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY did he have to kiss me. WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY??

anywayz....

i hope he didnt tell Happy...or imma be in deep shit!

boy u make me wanna

grreat!

i feel nothing...i dont even feel like i cheated..i really dont.

crazy?? no i dont think so

i just lay and listen to songs that say everything that im thinking but wont say

p.s

my legs still hurt

Time.

yeaaa he still didnt call me....

but i know its not bcus he dont want to
he's scared....hes always scared and shy and nervous

he is really not who i thought...lol it's kinda funny now. I use to be in love with him, like seriously. Now that I was intimate with him i'm kinda lost. Like really lost. My feelings are not as strong because it took so much energy for me to get him. I always get what I ask for and I got it. I never kicked it with him solo and when I got the opportunity I did. He is alot different from what I expected. He is REALLY aggressive. I feel like if I didn't want to have sex with him he would have forced me to. I really didn't have an opinion. Even though I did want it to happened, when I left my house that night I never intended on having sex with him. I just wanted to chill, then come back another day and hook up. He is really stronger than what he used to be. He lifts like hella weights now and I couldn't control him. He knew what he wanted when he called me that night, he knew. It didn't go the way I wanted. I'm a very visual person. I wanted it to be like in the movies. I wanted passion! I wanted to want him but I didn't. I did but I didn't. Never once did I think about Prince. I laid on my back while Eric was in between my legs thrusting uncontrollably. I moaned from pain not pleasure. I faked every moan and grunt. He talked the whole time. I laid there as the head board banged against his wall and he went faster and faster. He came in like 7 minutes. If that. I was probably the best he had in a while but only because I was super tight. Every man loves a new car with no miles that he can ride and take places that its never been. That's how I look at it. "i'm about to cum," he said. I wanted to cum. I wanted it to be over but at the same time I wanted it to last so I could experience my first 'big-O'.

Should I go back?
Not even I know what I will do.
I'm not attached to him in any way.
I hope he didn't think I would be a crazy virgin chick from hell that would stalk him.
No.
Not me.
I stalked him more before the sex..LOL
Only time will tell
I'm thinking about calling tomorrow..
So we will see.....


Stay tuned!

Can't Feel My Legs, Somebody Help Me

What a Night!!!


yea i never intended for it to go that far.......or maybe I did.
but do i regret it???
no not yet at least....

he called me...i returned his call.
we talked.
he asked me to come outside.
i did.
i got in the truck.
we talked.
we drove.
we sat in front of his house.
we talked.
we went into his house.
into his room.
he showed me pictures, clothes and shoes.
we watched tv.
he cut the lights off.
we wreslted.
we talked.
he kept trying to go up my shirt.
NO.
he kissed my neck.
he kissed my stomach.
he kissed my lips.
we talked.
i touched him.
he talked.
he kept trying to pull my jeans off.
he touched me.
he turned the tv off.
he took my jeans off.
he talked.
he touched me.
i got on top of him.
i kissed his neck and chest.
I'm done.
I rolled.
I layed down.
his fingers entered.
he tried to.
i told him to strap up.
he did.
he entered.
it hurted like hell.
i didnt complain.
do it hut.
no...im cool.
do it hurt.
no.
do it feel good.
yes.
you like it.
yes.
breathing.
im about to cum.
imma sleep all day.
thinking....
lays his head on my stomach.
i rub his head and ears.
what we do is between us. dont nobody gotta know.
dont tell nobody.
make sure you dont tell nobody.
let me know when u ready, cus i can lay here all day.
wat time is it.
3:40
wheres my jeans.
where my shirt.
gets dressed.
gets phones and purse.
can barley stand up.
we leave.
drives me home.
imma call you tomorrow ms. B
iight.

BULLSHIT!

I hooked up with Eric.

Like Just Right Now. :(